Episode #17 – Hot Fuzz

Being Wright Never Felt So…Right

After seeing Baby Driver (not the movie with Hulk Hogan pile driving babies), we felt it appropriate to make an episode where we focus on how great Edgar Wright is. In today’s cinematic climate with schlock-filled movies, lazy writers, and hack directors, it’s important we acknowledge one of the active greats.

We only cover his movies though (specifically Hot Fuzz). We’ll do another full episode in the future where we cover his boyish good looks and charm.

Muller? I Hardly Know Her!

Muller has officially been outed. After the intro segment to this week’s show, the world now knows of his love for the big ladies. I’m sure he is being honest about his physical attraction to these behemoths, but let’s dig a littler deeper. If you’ve picked up on any Muller swindles you can see what is really going on here.

Fat people typically have more food laying around the house and they also typically order more at a restaurant than an average person. Can’t you see? These are PERFECT opportunities for Muller to swoop in and mooch grub, satisfying his two most primal urges: big women and free food. Then Muller moves on. He roams the countryside in search of his next large lady and free dinner.

“No Muller is ever too old to look at an overweight woman, and no overweight woman is ever too fat to hope that he will look.” – Old Lithuanian Proverb

Is It Too Soon?

A few weeks ago we spent an entire episode discussing a movie we like: Mad Max: Fury Road. Look, we realize our fans NEED the weekly movie hate every second week, but there are exceptions to every rule.

If it weren’t for exceptions, we wouldn’t have Denzel Washington’s entertaining killing spree in The Equalizer, would we? But let’s not get carried away. I think we can all agree that Denzel Washington is a little overrated. Middle-aged mom’s and dad’s love him. But if you have half a brain, you can see that he plays the same boring, by-the-book detective, corrupt CIA agent, rough around the edges with a heart of gold, drunk air pilot, blind post-apocalyptic survivor in every movie.

I mean, I do like his comedies, his superhero movies, (both of them), and even his vampire movies. But if you want to see a REAL good action thriller about a man seeking revenge for losing the one thing he loved by taking out a Russian gang that also came out in 2014, go see John Wick.

I do really like his comedies.

All This To Say

Don’t be an idiot and let which actors appear in a movie decide what you watch! Instead, tune into the episode and let us also berate you on why it is both important and the moral life choice to follow talented directors instead of actors. Don’t be an idiot.

Now take a hike!

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