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REBIRTH!
I honestly thought this was the end for RMwRM.
After the events of the last episode, in which we watched the most bleak post-apocalyptic dystopia movie I’ve ever seen, Ready Player One. It’s not dystopian in its subject matter, but in the desolate state the movie industry is left in its wake.
A nightmare world where the only movies left that aren’t sooper hero movies, are ones that replace the story with references to sooper hero movies.
If Ready Player One can be called a movie, then the thought of watching another movie made me sick.
In a last ditch effort I managed to drive a few towns over to one of the only theaters available playing Isle of Dogs. The latest wankfest from hipster trash auteur, Wes Anderson. Being the contrarian basement-dwelling loser that I am, I felt completely rejuvenated by the warmth of Wes Anderson’s hot cum as it drenched my face and covered my body in perfect symmetry.
No. They cannot win. Someone has to let the people know that they are disgusting in liking the things they do. They have to feel bad. They need to know shame. I want to live in a world where people are so afraid to talk about their interests that they just don’t.
It’s time to derail another beloved trainwreck.
More like NOpiercer
Snowpiercer is a movie that can fuck right off.
Somehow I allowed its widespread critical praise to fool me into thinking it would be good enough to bother watching. I forgot that widespread critical praise doesn’t account for widespread critical retardation.
What I can’t figure out is if people only like it because having Chris Evans star in the movie can be considered a reference to a sooper hero movie or if it’s because it makes them feel smart for having the same kind of rich social commentary that can be found in the lyrics of a song written by a 14 year old’s garage punk band.
Wow, I never thought that class inequality was bad before. Thanks Snowpiercer Man for this brilliant takedown of every society ever.
Really this movie just made me dream of a class system where people who like this movie are stuffed into the back train cabs that are then diverted over to a one way track to Auschwi…
END